a jaundiced eye: Press Release: May 16, 1997

a jaundiced eye: press release
for may 16, 1997

For Immediate Release:

RALEIGH, NC -- May 16, 1997 -- "A Jaundiced Eye," the web design gadfly
site, announced today the completion of the first phase of an ambitious
project to bring a consistent user interface to the World Wide Web.

"Our goal," said "Steven" Champeon, "publisher" of "A Jaundiced Eye," 
"is to vastly reduce the amount of wild creativity being wasted on the
Web. With consistent, repetitive design, every Web site could share the
raw functionality of Windows 95."

Already such Internet heavy-hitters as Microsoft, Wired, c|net, Apple,
U. S. Robotics, ZDNet, Upside, RSA Data Security, Inc., Vignette, the
Internet Daily News, CNN, ESPN SportsZone, and Kleiner Perkins have 
joined in the plan, code named Operation Nav Bar Down the Left Side 
of the Screen.  "c|net has even gone an extra step in reducing
wasted creativity," said Champeon, "by not just recycling their design,
but by reprinting press releases on news.com."

Today's announcement coincides with the formation of Designers for
Uninventive, Lame Layout (DULL).  DULL's mission, as the World Wide Web
arm of the enormous  Bureau for the Orderly Reduction of Imagination, 
Novelty and Gaudiness (BORING), is to further encourage the development
of consistent, uninventive Web design.

"While corporations are ideally suited for the elimination of
free-thinking creativity and have adopted the plan whole-heartedly, 
many maverick personal sites still suffer from original, striking 
design," sighed Champeon.  "It's a problem."

Starting today, DULL will begin certifying sites based on their
compliance with pre-defined design goals.  Level Yellow will be granted
to sites, like c|net, that show such single-minded consistency in design
that they become ripe targets for smart-ass little parodies.  Levels
Blue, Lime Green, Gray, Red and Puce will all be awarded for lesser
compliance with design ideals. Levels Gold and Silver will be awarded
to the highest bidder and/or venture capitalists.

"Of course, we'd like to see everybody earn a Yellow badge," said
Champeon, "but there are still some free thinkers out there who believe
that a blue nav bar is just as good as a yellow one.  They will be
assimilated."

For more information, please contact Steven Champeon at

   editor@jaundicedeye.com

or visit A Jaundiced Eye's DULL Badge Program Instructions Page.

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